Small Conceits

Musings. Stories. Poems. From where I stand.

Beginnings: Meeting “Bo”

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From the original posting on the G.R.R.A.C.E. website:

Bodhi GRRACE photo

Photo courtesy of Dan and Barb Lawhorn

Hi! My name is Bo. I’m a 2 year old Golden whose family lost their home; I came to GRRACE by way of a local animal shelter. While I was at the shelter, I was really anxious – lots of noise and barking got me really excited. But the moment I left that place, I became a totally different boy – calm, easy-going and so very glad to be back in a home again. It seems that in a laid-back place, I’m a laid-back guy.

Adoption standards

I was decidedly nervous.

This was a very different process for me. In fact, when I’d adopted Sachi, my first Golden Retriever, from the Humane Society about a decade before, there was a whole lot less process in the process. I happened to wander in the day they released her from quarantine for adoption, and she stole my heart. After filling out an application and enduring a short waiting period, I took her home — where she promptly turned my life upside down in the most welcome and wonderful ways.

As it turned out, adopting Sachi from the Humane Society was a fluke. The Golden Retriever Rescue and Community Education organization, or G.R.R.A.C.E., usually snapped up surrendered Goldens before they could be adopted out. The organization’s members considered themselves not only breed enthusiasts but also stewards —  loving protectors of these friendly, sensitive, goofy dogs. In addition to an application, there was a questionnaire and a phone interview, followed by a home visit.

G.R.R.A.C.E had high standards. I was reservedly hoping to measure up to those standards today. I wasn’t ready for another dog, but my Coyote needed one.

In the nine months since Sachi died, shattering my heart and my world, Coyote, my sweet old husky mix, had lost her spark. Without her partner-in-crime to scheme and play with, she became withdrawn and depressed. I tried spoiling the old girl, taking her for extra walks — even feeding her from the table — to cheer her up. But while it was clear she loved me, she was desperately missing canine companionship. She’d sometimes gaze up at me with a sigh as if to say, “Oh, human…you’re so dear. But you’re just not Sachi.”

I couldn’t stand it anymore. I felt like I’d lost two dogs, not just the one who died. So, I’d taken a deep breath, filled out and submitted the forms, and steeled myself for the impossible task of replacing Sachi.

Almost two months later, I received an email: G.R.R.A.C.E. had a dog they thought might be a good fit for me. He was a robust two-year-old Red Golden. Would I agree to a phone interview with his foster mom?

I glanced over at Coyote where she laid napping on her cushion. It had taken her a full year to bond with Sachi, and I felt certain I’d be doing a lot of interviews, a lot of home visits, before she’d accept a new dog into our home.

Sure, I thought. Sure we can do an interview. But I’m not the one who will be making this decision.

“Bo” makes a home visit

Entry from Barb’s journal:
Dec. 31, 2013 – We took Bo over to meet a potential adopter. Denise Dilworth, who lives near Butler University. She has a beautiful white female Husky mix named Coyote, and both of them are still grieving over the loss of Sachi, their other Golden who died in March…Dan and I were on the verge of deciding whether to adopt him ourselves, but we know Denise is the perfect match for him.

The phone interview had gone well. Barb Lawhorn, along with her husband, Dan, and their own Golden Retriever, Trooper, were fostering my prospective adoptee, who was recovering from a case of kennel cough he’d contracted at the shelter. Barb seemed nice. She had a sweet voice and a lovely laugh. She decided I was worthy of the hour-long drive it would require them to make a home visit. In fact, she and Dan would be bringing the dog along with them to see how he interacted with my Coyote.

At the appointed time, just a couple of days later, Coyote barked to let me know they’d arrived. I peered out the front door to see two kindly-looking people with a big red-coated Golden Retriever nearly dragging one of them across the yard on a leash. Despite my promise to myself, I immediately started comparing him with Sachi: big and muscular vs. small and delicate; red vs. blonde; thin feathers and skirt vs. full ones; broad, masculine head… I took a deep breath. I needed to stop.

I greeted the Lawhorns by waving them in while I held Coyote’s collar. Barb came in first, shaking my hand by way of introduction, and Dan followed with the dog they called “Bo,” straining at the leash. After a moment or two of swirling excitement, we let go of the dogs to let them get acquainted.

Bo dwarfed Coyote, and I watched closely as the two dogs circled each other, hackles up — Bo stiff-legged — but tentatively wagging their tails. Bo was the first to break away, running to Dan, who’d seated himself in a chair, and burying his head in Dan’s lap for comfort. He was nervous, unsure. Dan suggested I call him, so I did. Bo ducked his head and wagged submissively as he trotted obediently over to where I sat on the floor. After briefly sniffing me, he turned plopped himself unceremoniously into my lap. Barb laughed, snapping a photo of us.

“Well, he looks right at home!” she said.

Just then, Coyote did something astonishing: With a wide, mischievous husky grin, she bounded into a deep play-bow.

Coyote makes her choice

Continued, from Barb’s journal:
Bo made himself right at home, and Coyote even perked up a little bit. I thought Denise was going to cry she was so happy to see that! I think she is going to be the best adopter we could possibly find.

Bo responded immediately by springing on her, and the two of them played so raucously that I had to shout above the din, “Okay, all dogs outside!”

Coyote darted for the back door, with Bo in hot pursuit. I let her out, then closed the door behind her, trapping the rambunctious Golden inside for a moment. While Barb and Dan waited behind us, I told Bo to sit, then softly called his name…and waited.

It took a moment for him to realize I was waiting for something. He broke his laser focus on the doorknob just long enough to do exactly what I’d hoped he’d do: make eye contact. I smiled at him and told him he was a good boy before opening the door to let him join Coyote in the yard.

I’m not the only one who has to pass muster in this deal, I said to myself.

Once outside, the two dogs enthusiastically played a game of chase, stopping only now and then to pee on a tree or a clump of grass, each trying to outdo the other. I stood transfixed by the change in Coyote. She leaped and darted about, her bottle-brush tail stretched out with the joy of running, her eyes happy and shining, not quite able to outmaneuver Bo as she had our less nimble Sachi. I hadn’t seen this much energy in months.

“I feel like you’ve given me my dog back,” I whispered through a throat choked with tears.

Barb and Dan smiled, watching the pair as they disappeared at full speed around the corner of the house, then back again into view.

“I forgot the paperwork at home, or I’d leave him with you today,” Barb said, beaming at me. “I think this is a very good match, don’t you, Dan?” Dan nodded, smiling.

I drew a deep, quavering breath, stilling myself a moment. “That’s okay,” I replied. “I’m not quite ready yet. I have a lot to do.” There was a bed to buy, a new bowl, a leash, a collar, food… And there was also preparing my heart for moving another Golden into our little pack. A not-Sachi.

Watching the two dogs streak across the yard and down into the trees, I knew that particular preparation was something I’d be able to manage much more easily than I’d anticipated.

Bodhi gets comfy

Photo courtesy of Barb Lawhorn


My deepest gratitude to Barb Lawhorn for sharing her journal entries with me and to her and Dan for providing loving support, especially as Bodhi and I adjusted to each other. (Yes, I’m referring to the “inappropriate ingestion” incidents.) I loved that you both continued to care about him, to welcome with enthusiasm the photos I sent you as he grew into himself, long after your relationship with him in an “official capacity” ended. Bodhi adored you both, as our visit to you just over a year ago clearly illustrated. In the beginning you were his rescuers. In the end, you were also mine.

Author: Denise

I'm Denise. I believe that stories lurk in all the tiny moments that make up our everyday lives. They wait, curled into themselves, until someone finds them and jailbreaks them, leading them out into the light. And there's always a story.

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